When
it first started showing more "debilitating" symptoms I couldn't
figure out what was wrong with me. No matter how well I was doing or what I did
it didn't go away. No amount of prayer or bible reading made it go away or even
seemed to affect it at all. Actually, it seemed the more I fought it, even
through spiritual means, the worse it got.
After
fighting it for a few years with seemingly no progress I truly wished I could
just die. I sympathized with people who committed suicide. The one thing that
kept me from entertaining suicidal thoughts myself is the fact that God
"works all things together for good".......... I tenaciously held
onto that belief.
In
time I have come to view it as one of, if not perhaps the greatest dilemma
facing myself and others in the church today; How to view and or help myself
and others, especially Christians, affected by it. I also think that it is, perhaps, one of our
greatest opportunities.
One
of the things that have helped me with it is to begin to quit
"fighting" it and trying to make it just go away and to accept that
it is a part of my life. Perhaps for the rest of my life. I also am learning to
accept Gods grace and all of His promises in spite of it.
Perhaps
the most potent scripture for me in relation to it has been where Paul wrote
that he Gloried in needs and "distresses" for when he was weak then
he was strong. He wrote that Gods power is "made perfect in weakness.
Probably
the greatest practical thing I have learned to do in relation to it is to thank
God for it as an opportunity to suffer in this life for his glory, since
glorifying God is the ultimate good and end of all things. This helps me with
it tremendously.
I
have wondered if those that suffer from it have a greater opportunity to
glorify God since God is greatly glorified when we thank him in the midst of
suffering. It is depression and I can honestly say that I have made friends
with the pain.
Written by Bruce Stuart
